Emotional relearning

Life always reminds us, if we will listen.

So the other day I tackled a repair on my truck. As usual, I expected there to be one thing that would be difficult. When I climbed underneath it the carter pin came out perfectly. Then the bolts all broke perfectly. Yet, in the back of my mind, I knew that something was going to go wrong. I have found that repairs on a vehicle always have a twist.

Once I got the separator to knock the taper out I went to get my three-pound hammer. It was nowhere to be found and after enquiring with my wife I found out that it had been stolen. Several months ago my stepdaughter had taken it over to the house she was remodeling. Someone then broke in and stole it.

I don't know if you have ever tried to do something with the wrong tool but take it from me it sucks. I learned that lesson a long time ago but life is all about throwing refreshers your way when you forget. The heaviest thing I had was a large pipe wrench. That not only didn't work but physically kicked my butt.

To be completely transparent I am a grumpy mechanic. What I mean by that is that when things go wrong I get grumpy, sometimes boarding on angry. This time I held true to my nature and was pretty upset. Snapped at my wife, shut the door too hard, all the classic "I am now a forty-eight-year-old child again" symptoms.

So I did the only logical thing and gave up. This was Saturday, I was drenched in sweat, out of breath and it took me a few minutes to calm down, after which I apologized to everyone I was short with (another part of my nature).

Now for the lesson relearned. We all deal with emotions as we are all human. There is no way around it no matter how hard we try; I tried for years. Sometimes those emotions don't fit the situation. Sometimes we have anger in place of compassion, others we feel hurt where understanding is applicable.

My anger was definitely the wrong emotion for that event. It was the wrong emotional tool to deploy. Just like the pipe wrench was the wrong tool to break that damn taper. The good news is that I got the proper tool today to finish the repair of my truck. My stepdaughter picked up a three-pound hammer for me yesterday (she also bought the tie rod end for me). Three taps with it and the taper broke.

Emotions are our tools to deal with the world around us. They are another sense just like out sight, smell, hearing, and touch. They bring insight and aid in social interactions. But when we deploy the wrong one, or we allow our actions to reflect the wrong one, we face only frustration and could possibly break a relationship. The right tool will always make the job so much easier just as searching one's intentions make relationships stronger.

Grace, I don't tell you enough. but I want you to know that I am grateful for everything you do around here and I am proud of the woman you are. I really do love you, thank you for being my stepdaughter. PS you are much better at this adulting stuff than I ever was.

#relearning